I Heart my Genderqueer Papa

For me, it was the birth certificate; there it was, in black and white (well, black and light blue): my wife of 3 years as the Mother, and me as Father/Parent, with sex “F”. Myself being genderqueer, the need for my sex on the birth certificate of my child was problematic, but there was something undeniably vindicating about opening that envelope. Here our marriage is only recognized in a few states, and even here in New York, only recognized in some institutions, but we didn’t have to go through any special applications or appear in court to have this document issued correctly.

When the “It Gets Better” campaign started hitting the internet I had mixed feelings about it. I was excited about the coverage it was getting, the visibility it was bringing to youth suicide in the LGBT community, and the activism it was inspiring in queer youth communities. However, I did not make a video. I felt like something was missing – a conversation about how sometimes it doesn’t get better. And sometimes it gets better for some people and not to others.

Below is an article for the Guardian that takes a critical look at the “It Gets Better” campaign and brings up some of the same concerns that I found running through my head. I don’t believe that “It Gets Better” is harmful, bad, or not useful – but I do believe that it’s important to look at it from multiple perspectives. And that it cannot be the only movement towards normalizing queer experiences.

In the wake of It Gets Better

The campaign prompted by recent gay youth suicides promotes a narrow version of gay identity that risks further marginalisation

Link to full Guardian article: http://gu.com/p/2y5bz